Last week I had the pleasure of joining other homeschool moms in a Christmas tea (which of course reminded me that I must have a proper tea more often). We started talking about style, spa’s and such, which is kinda’ rare among homschooling moms so you can imagine my excitement, when one mom commented that her husband can easily pick out the homeschooling mom because they dress so practical (read: frumpy).
Everyone laughed because it was true. Ill-fitting jeans (or *gasp* overalls), t-shirt, sweater tied around the waist and tennis shoes (or Crocs) are pretty much the norm. Of course this is epidemic is not just found in homeschooling moms. Check out that photo of me about 5 years ago, well before I was a homeschooler.
Yes, this was the finest going-on-a-family-outing outfit I had. Frumpy…I mean practical…indeed!
So as the conversation went on, one mom admitted that she didn’t feel like she needed to fix herself up now since she never did it in high school (I’m guessing that she may have also meant that she didn’t fix herself up much when she met her husband either).
I can certainly understand her reasoning.Why put in the effort now if you what you have been doing is working just fine? Well, as you can probably tell from that photo on the right, I thought it was working just fine as well. And this is coming from a gal that did put in the effort…a lot of effort…into fixing myself up in high school and college.
So why put it the effort now?
There were many reasons for my hiccup in style and personal care, most of them psychological honestly (I really need to write a post just on that). But as I began to work through them I saw more and more reasons of why the effort is worth it to me.
- It makes me feel productive. Just the simple act of blow drying my hair and putting on a blouse rather than a tee makes me feel like I’ve already checked things off of my to-do list.
- It makes me feel energized. It’s so easy to want to lounge about when your wearing sweats, isn’t it? But when I put on a pretty little skirt, even if I’m just at home, that hitch in my giddy up just disappears.
- My husband appreciates it. A few years back, my hubby and I did some relationship building exercises. One of those exercises was to write down 10 things that I could do to show my love for him. Guess what one of those things was…yup, fixing myself up!
- I like looking pretty, gosh darn it! Needs no explanation.
Sure it’s not easy to fix yourself up after kids, but I think the effort is totally worth it.
What do you think? Is it fixing yourself up worth it? Why or why not?
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I can’t speak from a post-baby perspective yet, but in my experience working for myself, I am pretty much guaranteed to get more done in a shorter amount of time if I act like I’m going in to the office: up early, breakfast, shower, and a coordinated, well-fitting outfit. Sometimes even make up, but not always. When I need to get a lot done, I even put on some ballet flats I bought just to wear at home, it’s just enough of a “business shoe” to get my rear in gear.
My SIL recently had a baby, and I don’t think she’s ever put much thought into her appearance, which is totally valid, because she certainly has other talents. But just knowing how challenging it is to balance life with a new baby, getting back your figure, etc., I worry that her lack of effort on the personal appearance front will just be the gateway to her checking out of having her own life, relinquishing all self-agency, while bringing up baby… There’s a lot to be said for the dynamic between your personal appearance/ self-care, and self-esteem and confidence.
I totally know what you mean about the shoes! I’ve long since got rid of house slippers because they make me feel so lazy.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts Allie! Hey, and great blog too!